Johnny Knoxville says he’s been running through a gauntlet of emotions since his friend and “Jackass” co-star Ryan Dunn died last week … ranging from mind-numbing sadness to anger directed at Ryan.
Knoxville went to his blog this weekend … and explained why he froze up while speaking at Ryan Dunn’s memorial service last week … saying he tried his best, but “What came out were the mumblings of a man trying his best not to cry.”
Knoxville writes, “Here is what I wished I could have told everyone then.”
During the painfully honest blog, Johnny explains how much he loved Dunn — he loved Dunn’s “hair trigger laugh reflex … Dunn was a great listener … a great friend … “as loyal as they come.”
But midway through the tribute, Knoxville expresses his discontent with Dunn … saying, “I’m becoming upset now because this isn’t right, goddamnit. Ryan, I had to go wake up Madison and tell her you were gone. Do you know how hard that was?!! She loved you so much and I know you loved her, so why, buddy? Rocko will never get to know you like she did, nor will my daughter that is coming in October. I cry a lot about that.”
Knoxville — who refers to Dunn as his “brother” — closed the post by saying, “I don’t know what else to say right now, so I will close with I love you, Ryan. I have a lot of emotions swirling, but I want you to know I love you so very much.”